Letter 49

June 23, 2011


Dear Mom,


Hopefully, you are getting your business out of the way with less opposition than myself. I'm healthy, for the moment, and basically stress-free. As regards to spinning wheels, I feel stymied. When I legitimately pursue a course of action, and do everything I'm supposed to do, I ultimately meet with failure every single time.


Prison is having an opposite effect on me, as it does to many people, and I feel and look like a 50 year old man instead of being preserved by my time here. Surprisingly, it is not the larger issues that are continuing to cause me grief but the relatively insignificant things we go through here...like not getting any SALT! That causes me to age prematurely. Likely, this is an issue that seems ridiculous and trivial but because the last time I saw any salt was the 10th of June, and the orderlies that pass it out have a guaranteed supply while the rest of us do without, it aggravates me.

It is a completely unfair system, which only perpetuates the haves and the have-nots type thinking that is responsible for many of us being here. Now, I don't know how much longer this pen is going to hold out, or if my letters are even making it to you, so I'll be concise. I've given up trying to see the eye doctor while I'm still here, but will pursue it when I get off close management status.

According to what I recall, you are looking up the wrong tree. I took the GED exams in Topeka, KS, not in Louisiana. That is why they have no records pertaining to my scores. I don't even think I had any plans to be tested when I was in Louisiana.

Though something may easily have caused a delay, it has been a week since the last estimated delivery date...and still no books. Hopefully, they will arrive between now and when you receive this but if not I'm hoping there is a way to track the delivery for me.

My classification officer still has not gotten back to me; hopefully, next week. I grow more susceptible to ailments caused by ordinary stressors daily. J is indicating to me he wants to say hi and thank you for your efforts on his/our behalf. On that note, I can't say anything else.

Much love,
James